May- I moved to town. I ate out largely due to unpacking, lack of knowledge about the location of my dishes and cooking supplies, and not having a working oven. But I ate out remembering my slogan. It wasn't all healthy but it wasn't all unhealthy because I had a vision, a purpose.
By June 20th, I eat out most days because I forget to do things like defrost a few slices of gluten free bread so that I can pack a sandwich. At night, I can't even explain. It's not that I can't explain why I might eat out at night. I just can't tell you what I eat. But I do, just not mindfully. Sometimes, like yesterday, I eat my meal and say, "Food should taste good" because it should. Otherwise, it should be consumed because of the health value or perhaps (which is often the case) it is being consumed in waste-- lots of calories, lots of carbs, trans fat, not delicious. Living with intention. The reality I want to have.
Post grad move 1- I unpacked. I was pleased with that apartment for the most part. 18 months into that living experience, when it was time to move, I had filled the space and it was time for an expansion.
Move 2- Lovely house, finally enough space for me but it had funny smells that created an uneasy feeling about my decision to live there. I stopped unpacking due to distrust in my location and made a decision to move once my lease was up. Over time, I left doors open while gone for the day (landlord's suggestion) and focused on moving only to save money. So I did. Lower rent.
Move 3- beautiful little house, the beginning of horrible landlords. I didn't unpack as it didn't take me a month to see that my landlord had no intention of taking care of her property.
And now, move 4. Again, it was almost immediately that I came to see that my landlord is horrible. This time, however, I made a commitment to unpack as this trip is a shedding. I filled boxes of materials to do away with hopefully through a fall yard sale. As I unpack, I slowly add additional items to yard sale boxes. The gem will be getting into the boxes that have moved and moved and moved unopened. How much values do those items really hold? Shed. Craft a new reality. Also, I miss the photo work. I need a space welcoming of craft.
Reality-- my health is all that I have in the end.
June- 30 days to unpack would have passed. Time to add back in other aspects of life. Exercise. My starting point was simply a weekly commitment to movement. Weeks 1 & 2 manifested in swimming & water play (around 4 hours/2 hours). Tomorrow, I plan to engage in yoga at home. Soon, I hope to visit a gym. Today, I apparently, I decided to start a new blog experience on health. I deleted my sparkpeople page; I started fresh here. I started because there was a tug of dread over how much remains unpacked and the fact that I am bringing in perhaps 20 unpacked boxes next week (currently stored at someone else's house). So much to do, so difficult to face in joy and sunshine. But, I rise.
Namaste.
p.s.- plus the bugs. the dang bugs! why are there somethings like gnats flying around my apartment-- no fruit, no leaks (unless an unidentified leak is the reason for the wet living room carpet), not because of trash. wtf?!
